The big reveal

"Believe that God is with you in your struggle.  He is always for you and never against you." -Michael S. Barry "A Reason for Hope."

The Big Reveal

I have now finished the sixth, and NOT final round of chemo.  Doc says since my body is responding so well to the chemo the board has recommended three more rounds of chemo, with a CT scan after the second round. UGH.  I guess I can do it, what choice do I have?  Then we'll see about radiation.

In other news, please keep my dad in your prayers - he's having surgery on Tuesday (3/18) for an irregular heartbeat.  They are going to try to shock it into a regular heartbeat.

Finally, it took six rounds, but the hair has finally gone...

What do you think?  Leave a comment.

"Keep me safe, my God, for in you I take refuge.  I say to the Lord, 'You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing.'" -Psalm 16:1-2

CT results

CT results

Howdy, folks.  Just thought I would take a minute and post my CT results for all to see.  From the doc:

FINDINGS: 

1. Right chemoinfusion catheter tip terminates in the upper right atrium.

Yay, my port is still there and in the right place!

2. No chest adenopathy, pleural effusion, or lung nodule. Normal tracheobronchial tree. Stable small lung scars bilaterally.

Yay, my chest looks good!

3. Normal solid abdominal organs, without evidence of metastatic disease. Normal gallbladder.

Yay, my guts look good and are in the right place!

4. A previously noted 11 x 7 mm left paraaortic lymph node now measures 8 x 5 mm (image 214 series 2). A few much smaller stable lymph nodes are noted adjacent to the aorta and vena cava.

Yay, my heart looks good!

5. A previously described 12 x 10 mm left external iliac lymph node at the left common iliac bifurcation has decreased in size and now measures 7 x 7 mm. An 8 x 5 mm left internal iliac lymph node is now barely measurable. A 10 x 9 mm right common iliac

node is also now barely measurable (image 237 series 2). There are no new or enlarging lymph nodes.

Yay, my problem lymph nodes have shrunk back down!  Only 1 is measurable!

6. Widely patent rectal anastomosis. No acute bowel abnormality. No ascites or peritoneal nodules. Stable mild left anterior pelvic scarring.

Yay, my, ummmmm, plumbing looks good!

7. A fat attenuation lesion in the left gluteus medius muscle laterally measures 5.0 x 1.3 x 3.0 cm. On 10/29/13 it measured 4.8 x 1.2 x 2.6 cm. On 10/23/12, it measured 3.6 x 0.9 x 2.2 cm. The lesion demonstrates a single subtle septation. No lytic or

blastic bone lesion is identified.

OK go ahead and giggle, I have fat in my butt that's getting bigger. 

=====

CONCLUSION: 

1. No evidence of chest metastatic disease. YAY!

2. No evidence of solid abdominal organ or peritoneal metastatic disease. YAY!

3. Clear size decrease of previously identified retroperitoneal lymph nodes in the pelvis and lower abdomen. No new or enlarging retroperitoneal lymph nodes. YAY!

4. Slowly growing lipomatous tumor in the left gluteus medius muscle. The tumor demonstrates a single subtle septation. The main considerations include a slowly growing lipoma and a low grade liposarcoma. Um, so I have fat in my butt getting bigger.  Doc says it's most likely benign and will keep an eye on it.

So I'm on the cusp of my sixth round of chemo and am rocking quite a chest cold.  I talked to the doctor today and he said to come in anyway, so I may be utterly miserable this weekend.  Keep praying, and I'll keep updating!

End of Feb Update

"Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood." -Helen Keller

It's now February 24th, 2014 and I have been through two more rounds of chemo and am standing on the doorstep of the second to last treatment.  I have been slacking on my posts lately, but if you have read my previous post, you know why.  Treatment has been somewhat easier.  It seems that I am finding the correct cocktail of drugs to get me through Tuesday after chemo.  The magical day.  It seems that if I can just get through the Tuesday after, my body goes back to normal.  Health updates...

I took my health screening at work last week and - wait for it - passed.  I had to fall within the boundaries of Blood Pressure, Cholesterol, Glucose, BMI, and Smoking.  I was within tolerance in 4 out of 5.  I'll let you speculate which one I missed.

My oncologist sent me over to a dermatologist for the rash on my face.  The dermatologist pretty much shrugged and said it is what it is and sent me on my way with a prescription for stronger hydrocortisone.  Apparently it's up to my face to get better on it's own.  Can't wait for that bill to come.

I had a CT scan last week and the results came back very well.  My lymph nodes have shrunk back down to within tolerable sizes!  Thanks to all who have been praying hard for good health and good test results.  Believe in the power of prayer - I do!  I will consult with the doc as to next steps with radiation but I know I'll be at least finishing my 6 rounds of chemo.

Good news - for those that aren't aware I have been working with the Colon Cancer Alliance to raise funds for research, prevention, and patient support.  My fundraising efforts have been a smashing success as I have more than doubled my goal of $1000:

If you are interested in contributing as well, please visit my page at Sean's Fight.  Also, did you know March is colon cancer awareness month?  You can show your support by wearing blue on March 7th to raise awareness.  If anyone asks why you are so blue, tell 'em to support Sean's fight!

"yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior.  The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights." Habakkuk 3:18-19

What fills my free time

"Faith is to believe what we do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what we believe." -Saint Augustine

I wanted to blog today a little bit about a couple of organizations that help keep me anchored as well as provide an escape from the chemo-induced haze of cancer treatment.  One being Cadets, the other being Spotlight Youth Theater...

Cadets

From the website calvinistcadets.org:

The Calvinist Cadet Corps is an independent (non-denominational) youth ministry organization whose purpose is to provide the local church with ministry programs that will enable them to effectively share Christ’s love with boys from their church and community. Founded in 1952, the Corps has more than 600 clubs throughout North America, a brother organization in Australia and New Zealand, and since 2006 has been working in Kenya and Uganda. We encourage any evangelical Bible believing church to consider using our ministry programs. The organization uses the title “Calvinist” to honor the Protestant reformer, John Calvin, who devoted his life to the religious education of God’s children.

I've been a Cadet Counselor to the middle school aged boys cadre (including my son) at Wheaton CRC for a few years now and it has been a blessing to see our boys learn more about God's creations and to help them grow in their faith.  We meet every other Tuesday and spend the evening reviewing our landmarks (motto, verse, hymn, code, and pledge), learning more about God through devotionals, and of course badgework.  Badges fall into the areas of Exploring (Community, Wilderness, Science, and Hobbies), Skills (Crafts, Camping, Sports, and Personal Development) and of course, Discovering God's Word.

I'd like to thank all the counselors and cadets at Wheaton who have walked with me, supported, and prayed for me on my journey with cancer as well as the other clubs throughout the U.S. and Canada who may have also been praying.  We are all Works in Progress. Philippians 1:4-6

Pancake breakfast fundraiser - back when I had hair...

Spotlight Youth Theater

From their website at www.spotlight.org:

Spotlight Youth Theater is a non-profit, educational children's theater arts program for students ages 5-18 in the Aurora, Cook, DuPage, Kane, Kenosha (WI), Lake, McHenry, Milwaukee (WI), Oak Park, Orland Park, Rockford Metro and Will County areas. Each area offers theater summer camps and kids' theater classes, kids' acting classes, kids' voice classes, kids' dance classes, improv and theater specialties. Spotlight produces family-friendly musical productions and also offers theater field trips for schools and school fine arts programs.

Their mission statement is "Reflecting Christ through the performing arts".  Boy, do they ever.

At 9 years old, my daughter has taken 13 different classes ranging from dance, musical theater, audition, and everything in between.   She is also in her second show, Seussical, at this time.  The shows are an absolute labor of love.  I am always impressed that a few directors can mold 100+ kids of various ages into such superb actors and actresses.  All of the shows have been absolutely spectacular.  I have been a parent volunteer in the tech committee for 4 different shows and have done everything from putting wireless mics on kids, cueing the sound board, running a light board, hanging lights, loading confetti cannons, running haze, fog, and dry ice machines...you name it!

I can't thank my Spotlight family enough for the love, encouragement, support, and prayers that you all have shown me over the past few months.  Do not be anxious about anything! Philippians 4:6-7

ta-daaaa!  Cindy Lou Who



Chemical Warfare

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.  And swing!" -Leo Buscaglia

I feel bad.

It's mostly the nausea during treatment, but it's also the fatigue after it.  I hate being tired constantly.  Too tired to do things with the wife and kids.

I feel bad that the Erbitux is destroying my face.  I feel hideous.  I don't know how my wife can stand to be around me.  It's like a second puberty has landed square on top of me.

I'm constantly thirsty.  I drank a whole bottle of apple juice the other day.  Now I'm eyeing the pineapple juice and the orange juice.

I can't sleep.  I'm constantly waking up to go to the bathroom (see the thirsty thing).  My rest is deep, but fitful, and in brief increments.  It doesn't help my fatigue.

The drugs - Zofran, Compazine, Doxycyclene, steroids, cremes, some Omeprazole for this, some Naproxen for that.  Take this pill to counteract that pill.

I'm one-third through.  Another third to go until a CT scan.  Then we'll see.

2nd treatment.  The cool washcloth helps my face...

"Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.  He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him.  With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation." -Psalm 91:14-16

Breaking Dad

"It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult undertaking which more than anything else, will determine its outcome" -William James

January 2nd, 2014 and my new year starts out with my first round of chemo.  I hit the cancer center at 10:30 in the morning for bloodwork and consultation with my oncologist. Treatment subsequently started with a round of vitamins, tylenol, and benadryl to help with delivery and side effects of the chemo.  I bided the time as best I could would the kids:

MADMA Season 9 cliffhanger!

Next came the chemo - FOLFIRI regimen.  The link to each of the drugs and their side effects are listed below, thanks to chemocare.com:

Erbitux

Irinotecan

This lasted another SIX HOURS.  Thankfully, only the first regimen will be this long, but followup sessions will still last about four hours.  So, to pass the time, I rested...

Benadryl makes you drowsy!

Watched a little TV...

Phineas and Ferb!

...and finally at about 5:30 when the regimen had finished, decided to freak out a couple of nurses and the doctor on duty by having an extremely rare side effect to the Irinotecan.  You know how sometimes you get that little muscle spasm in your eyelid and your eye twitches?  Imagine those spasms in most of your major muscle groups!  Thankfully it wasn't painful, just REALLY annoying.  I had to laugh though when the doc came in straight from his yoga session without even stopping to put his shoes on!  They tried to calm it with more benadryl, but only with the passing of time did the twitches end.

So at 6:30, the nurses sent me on my way, a full 8 hours after arriving in the morning.  Not the greatest way to pass the day, but at least I was with my family.

Now it's Saturday, two days removed, and I'm trying to manage the fatigue and the nausea as best I can.  I am only eating a fraction of what I normally do, which isn't a bad thing, I just have to take it slow.  I find keeping myself as busy as I can takes my mind off of the fatigue as well.

To close today, I would like to thank everyone who has been so encouraging to our family.  Please keep me and my family in your prayers, and don't worry, we'll holler if we need anything.  I will leave you until next time with a verse to ring in the new year:

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.  See I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland."  -Isaiah 43:18-19

POWER Port!

"There is no such thing as no chance." -Henry Ford

 Good day to you all.  This morning I headed once more to the hospital to get my Power Port inserted prior to chemo this Thursday.  I went in feeling pretty confident...

We told my daughter this was a kilt

After a quick shave/epilady of my chest followed by a nice warm scrubdown of the area I was wheeled off to surgery once again.

Now, I'm not sure how many of you have had surgery to know what "twilight" sedation is, but to sum it up, instead of putting a patient completely under it's kind of like a drunken stupor without the hangover the next day.  Typically I am a pretty cheap date - the nurse starts the anesthesia and the next thing I know I'm waking up back in my room with drool running down my chin.  Not so today.  She must have administered it much slower than normal because I got to feel every needle full of local anesthetics.  It's kind of unnerving considering they are inserting the catheter straight into my jugular (chemo burns up smaller veins and must be administered into larger veins like the jugular).  The "port" portion was inserted into my chest between the skin and pectoral muscles.  The doc said I have pretty tough skin.  He was having a time of it trying to get the port in there.  The result?

Hey, that wasn't too bad! Sponsored by Lay's

So here I sit back at home.  The meds are wearing off so the pain is coming on.  It feels like hammer blows to my chest right now.  For now I will rest.  Next post will be chemo round #1...

"I can finally see

that You're right there beside me

I am not my own

I have been made new

please don't let me go

I desperately need You"

-Meteor Shower, Owl City

In the beginning

On December 19th, 2013 my cell phone rang.  It was the day of my father's 80th birthday.  Instead of my father, though, it was my oncologist.  I had been waiting for the results of my biopsy that was performed the week prior. The cancer had returned.

My journey with cancer began in late 2010.  I can't say particularly when, since my symptoms were slow in development and painless in nature.  I passed some blood - not much - but persistently enough to make me go to the doctor by the end of the year.  One doctor led to another and by February 1st, 2011 (remember snowmageddon?) I was diagnosed with stage III colon cancer.  April 2011 found me in surgery to have my colon resectioned and a port-a-cath inserted for chemo treatments.  Chemo started at the end of April.  One session of FOLFOX every two weeks for twelve total sessions ending in mid-October of 2011.  I was cancer free...

I've been managing cancer since I was 37 years old.  I stayed in remission for almost exactly two years.  Now I must start the fight all over again.